Today is our 25th wedding anniversary. We are celebrating with our most precious gifts from God, our children, family and friends. When I met Steve 26 years ago, I knew immediately I wanted to marry him. Of course I could not forsee the many difficulties we would face in our relationship but I knew he was the one for me. At that time in my life I did not yet understand the true nature of relationships. I still thought of Steve as a "white knight on a stead" coming to sweep me off to our cozy castle in the sky. I now know there is no magical prince to save me from myself and no castle with a mote deep enough to protect me from myself. I have come to view relationships as a loving gift from our Creator to further help us grow into a whole and healed human being. Through our trials and tribulations, our own wounds are reflected to us through our beloved and lovingly handed right back into our own hands to heal or not. It is always our responsibility, this choice to heal and let go or stay stuck in the earthy mud and mire of blame and fault finding. And as these encounters do not always appear as "love-filled", this task is not for the faint hearted. The most basic need for approval and appreciation is usually one of the first illusions to come up for scrutiny and one of the most difficult to erradicate. But the good news is we have many, many opportunites to fail and try again, each and every day.
On this day of celebration I am so very grateful for this man of my dreams. This man who has pushed every one of my buttons, time and time again, just as I have pushed his. This man who refuses to let me out of this life with unhealed wounds. This man who has fathered my children and kept us all warm and fed. This man who has filled every need we have ever had and many, many of our wildest dreams. This man who has opened his heart to us when he could not trust it would not be broken, again. And again. And then again. This man who I love with my whole and broken, tattered and healing heart.
Thank you, dear God, thank you.