Kathleen Botsford

Dreaming of Italy

            

                                             
 

 

I have been looking through some of our photos from out trip to Italy 18 months ago.  Alex spent a semester there her senior year and we visited for Spring Break.  We had such a fabulous time and 'what happened in Italy, stays in Italy' is one of our favorite private jokes.   I had planned to put a book together with our photos and memories.  I have a huge plastic container with tons of ephemera I collected each step of the way.  I must get to that soon.  Or should I work on the mementos I brought back from Greece first?  That was in 2002.  Where does the time go?

                     

Two Winners

I was WAY under the weather last week and took the entire time off from everything; the laundry, cooking, dishes, exercising, blogging, even "wife-ing" (my husband was out of town so that was easy).  Everything except being a mom.  (*see previous post for an explanation)  So this week I randomly picked two commenters to receive a gift.  Their blogs are some of my very favorite places to hang out as are the blogs of my previous winners. 

Mansuetude of Tumbleword and Kablooey.  These woman are amazing and totally unique.  Mansuetude is a poet extraordinaire.  The combination of her prose and her photography will ignite a powerful longing in your soul.  A longing for something ancient and primal.  A remembrance of long forgotten heartaches and poignantly answered prayers.  Go on over and see where she takes you.  You won't be disappointed.

Head over to Kablooey for a sharp witted look at being a mother in this day and age.   Kablooey is unlike any friend I ever had when my children were young but she's my friend now and she is well worth the wait.  Her knack for capturing the irreverent humor in the everyday perils of mothering is astonishing.  I can't remember what I did for entertainment and companionship before I met all my blogging friends.  And they said it wouldn't last!

Auntie Em???

Does this look like Auntie Em to  you?  I know I may be prejudiced but this is definitely the face of Glenda the Good Witch as surely as I am the mother of this beautiful child.  Something seems to have gone amiss in the world of 'High School Musicals' in our neck of the woods.  Suffice to say, Victoria did not get the part she wanted.  She will play Auntie Em and be some sort of angelic voice which I do NOT remember from the movie....(maybe it's in the play or maybe they feel bad and are trying to make it up to her, hmmm?)

Victoria is not the only one in a tizzy.  The two seniors who did get cast as Glenda wanted Dorothy.  They are not happy campers either.  What is a mother to do?  I held her as she cried and cried.  I let her talk about quitting and refusing to be the Aunt of the FRESHMAN Dorothy.  I let her plot and plan to push said freshman off stage at the most apropos moment.  I let her vent and vent and vent.  And then I snuck in a tiny, very infinitesimal, little bitty word......'character'.....and stepped back, way back.

As I held my breath and braced for the indignant reproach we mothers of 16 year old girls are very familiar with, I was met with a surprising silence.  No explosion, no disdain, not even a rolled eye.  So I ventured a little further and reminded her of her brother and his challenges.  How he did not play football at the very same high school that 'seems' to be taking her talents for granted.  And how each Saturday, his former high school teammates sit in dismay as they tune in to see Stevie, bigger than life on national television, a member of  the Notre Dame football team. 

Disappointments are a part of life.  It seems even more heart wrenching when the one being disappointed is your child.  Always, always, we have more opportunities to learn and to grow in this wonderful school room we call 'Life'.....whether we want to or not.

Whew!  Victoria won't be giving up on Broadway just yet. 

Trees with No Name

 I find it very interesting that lately most of my collaging has transpired with text AND without any discernible words.  One of my spiritual 'practices' has been to notice whenever I label something or someone, become aware of said label and any ideas implied and then work to undo the label and let things 'just be.'  And as usual, I get lots of 'practice' with this practice.

I was aimlessly wandering through a book store the other day when I came upon this fabulous looking book  with lots of pictures of trees and their leaves and nuts and seeds.  Magnificent illustrations of the trees and their habitats.  Just the kind of book that puts me over the edge anticipating hours and hours of contented  perusing and study.  I was almost hyperventilating as I leafed through the large tome. 

Suddenly I became aware of just how silly my unquenchable thirst for knowledge really is.  What difference does it make if I know the name of a tree or not?   Does that make the tree any less beautiful and full of life? Does it add to it's 'worth' in any way at all?  I think not.  I gently placed the book back on the shelf and walked silently away.  

This autumn I will enjoy the trees and fauna that cross my path WITHOUT knowing a single thing about them.  I will honor and appreciate their innate and gentle beauty.  I will drink in their quiet strength.  I will become full of their peace-filled essence without having to know one single name or fact.  I will live in my body and not in my head.  And I will continue to practice, practice, practice.

P.S.  Today's "Thank You Giveaway" winner is Roxanne of Rivergarden Studio!  I will be contacting you with details!

Bittersweet Weekend

 

It was a bittersweet weekend.  The Irish lost to USC, our #1 rival, for the 8th time in a row.  A heart breaking loss at that but the whole family was at the game and lots of aunts, uncles and cousins too.  This weekend is another rival of sorts, Boston College.  Lots of family coming in for this game also.  Fall seems to be speeding past in a blur of football, tailgating, pep rallies, parties and dinners.  All fun each in their own rite but no time to stop and savor each individual event, each precious person.  Conversations jumble together.  Family and friends come and go.  It is the nature of the season AND completely against my own inner rythms.

I make a conscious point of keeping my calendar in balance.  Football and the Holidays seem to take on a life of their own and the only solution is to jump on the bandwagon and hang on for dear life.  It is tons of fun if I can stay focused on each day as it arrives and not look down the week to the flurry of activity awaiting us.  That can really overwhelm me.  One day at a time, I take what the Universe has to offer and leave the rest for future consumption.  I gets lots of practice in this area but the rewards of inner peace while in the midst of apparent chaos are well worth it.  

Oops!  Now the laundry is a different matter all together......

Drum Roll Please!

Today is my first 'Thank you Give-Away' drawing.  Drum roll please...............and the winner is......wait.......It's a tie!  Debbie W from Four Angels Momma and Jennifer from Wishful Thinking.   Hurray!  I will contact both of you privately to arrange the details.  Thank you for your support and wonderful comments as well as sharing your lives with me.  You are truly appreciated.

On to ordinary news; last weekend was a blur of activity with the kids in town and lots of fun.  We saw the new Vince Vaughn movie.  He is one of Stevie's favorites and the movie was cute, but well worth the price of admission to sit next to Stevie and listen to him laugh at Vince.  His laugh fills the entire theater.  I love it!

Alex's flight arrived Saturday morning at  9 and her return flight left at 9 Sunday evening.  The picture above is from the lunch we all shared on Saturday before Stevie had to head back to school.  Schedules and commitments, bah humbug!  Alex may not make it home for Thanksgiving and will miss our extended family Christmas celebration the weekend before Christmas.  Times are changing.  All I can do is take one day at a time and appreciate their presence when it is present.  And that is my spiritual practice.  Being present.   It may be simple, but try it sometime.  It definitely takes practice. 

A "Thank You" Give-away

 It seems I have had a wrong button pushed on my blog settings making it difficult for people to comment.  I think the problem has been solved so if you have had difficulty in the past, please try again!

I have been taking stock of my creative activities of late.  I love to design and make jewelry.  I am happy as a clam with glue and paint and papers strewn about my studio creating collages.  But I think one of my favorite pastimes is visiting the blogs of the wonderful friends I have met on the internet.  I love peeking into all of your lives and catching a glimpse of what is important to you.  I enjoy hearing the never ending sagas of your families and their comings and goings, their triumphs and setbacks.  I especially love to see how each one of you expresses YOUR creative soul.  I gather delicious recipes and listen to fabulous music I would never have encountered on my own daily rounds.  I hear of mind opening books and authors and have found links to some of the most provocative articles I have had the privilege to share.

 And the art.  The photography alone deserves it's own category in the "art gallery of cyberspace".  Each photo captures a story as well as the essence of it's creators' spirit and heart.  Photographs reaching out into the world, bringing us all together as we are brought into our deepest heart by experiencing the joys of being human on this magnificent planet, one language for all.  Art truly can bridge cultures and differences as the ancient saying "ALL IS ONE" leaps gracefully to life, right here in the 21st century through the magic of technology.

I am constantly inspired by the woman and men who are courageous enough to share their lives, the challenges as well as the joys, with all of us in the blogging community.  In this spirit I am launching a "give away" to say "Thank You" to each and everyone of you dear friends.  Each Wednesday from October 14 until December 16, I will randomly draw the name of one of the readers who left a comment on my blog that week.  The winner will choose from one of my necklaces, a pair of earrings or a set of post cards from my collages.  Of course the more comments you leave, the more chances you have of winning!  Your comments can be on any post, current or past.  This is my small way of saying Thank You.  Thank you for sharing your lives with me.  Your words and your art have touched my heart in more ways than I can say.  Thank you.

Fall Homecoming

It's a blustery fall afternoon here in Chicago.  It's cool and rainy.  Just how I like it.  I have the candles lit and the fireplace roaring.  A pot of spaghetti sauce is simmering away on the stove top.  Everyone is coming home this weekend!  Alex is homesick and coming in on Saturday morning to spend a mere 36 hours with her family and friends.  Coach Weiss has given the football players the weekend off too.  Stevie gets home Friday afternoon.  We have lunches planned and family dinners.  Of course there will be football.  Lots of football.  A fall weekend with the three little birdies all back in the nest.  Momma is a happy camper!

Tangled up in Blue (and Gold)

I have been trying to get my thoughts, my emotions AND photos from various cameras and people into some sort of order to write a post about last week's opening football game at Notre Dame.   I am still in a dither.  Here are some pictures totally out of sequence but I am off to a conference this weekend and I do not have the time to spend sorting them out.  I will also put my post on hold until next week.  I am continuing to sort myself out also.  

P.S.  How cute is this?  I found it in a book I pulled off the shelve this week.  My little boy has sure grown up.  There is no date but I can only imagine how long ago it was drawn.  Hmm....wasn't it yesterday???

Living Legacies

 

I was at spin class today for the first time in over a week.  I have had lots of fun company keeping me from my rigorous summer workout schedule.   A favorite cousin of mine whom I haven't seen in over 35 years came down from Michigan for the weekend.  It seemed like we had just awakened from our summer sleep over of 38 years ago,  all groggy and eager for shared secrets, gossip and companionship.  Not a moment had passed in all of those years of non-communication.  Not one moment.  It was lovely and soul-filled on so many levels.  We've made plans to meet this winter too.

When I returned from taking her to the airport Monday, two of my aunts were waiting for me in the kitchen.  I really love it when my aunts can come for a visit.  Lots of girl talk and laughing, good food and plenty of cocktails.  My mother died 10 years ago and this special time with her sisters feels like I have a part of my mom back with me.  I hear lots of stories I never knew before.  Some good stories and some showing my mother's less than shining side.  The side most of us like to hide from our children.  Those are the stories that are the most endearing to me.  I relish hearing about her "bitchiness"  and the unkind tricks she pulled as a kid.  It makes her human.  And that much more "real" to know she had her shadows just like the rest of us.

When I picked up my cousin at the airport, it was the image of her mother that greeted me.  She too, remarked on the moment she saw me in the car and recognized "Aunt Ann" immediately.  We are living legacies to our mothers.   While we have become our own women, we owe more than we can even imagine to our mothers.  And to our grandmothers, our aunts and our cousins.  To all of the women in our long line of ancestors and those yet to come.  In all directions of time.  It is the dance of love, the circle of life.  Now and forever, Amen.