Kathleen Botsford

The Alphabet vs The Goddess

When I was younger, I had an incredible appetite for knowledge.  I read everything I could find on any and all subjects that caught my fancy.  If I was into trees, I had to "know" the names of each, the shape of their leaves and attributes along with their habitat and history.  When I became a jewelry designer, each stone was a new world unto itself.  I could sit for hours fondling and gazing into the depth of each new obsession.  The crystals and stones became my personal project.  I researched constantly as books have always been my mainstay in life. 

As I have grown older I have noticed I no longer have the urge to know everything about anything.   Does my knowing the name of a tree make it any more or less magnificent?  Does it matter if I hold a rose quartz in my hand or a pink opal?  Words and labels have their place indeed but of late I am animated by something deeper, more intimate.   This very sentiment jumped out of a poem this morning.

The world does not need words. It articulates itself
in sunlight, leaves, and shadows. The stones on the path
are no less real for lying uncatalogued and uncounted.
The fluent leaves speak only the dialect of pure being.
The kiss is still fully itself though no words were spoken.

Dana Gioia

Peace in the World

O Holy Virgin
When you said 'Yes'
To housing God in your womb
You asked, as its price,
For peace in the world
Redemption for all the lost
Eternal life for the dead.
May I always pray with you
That your sublime prayer be granted.

Peter Chrysostom

 

Reprinted from DailyOm 365 Days of Prayers with Andrew Harvey

Note From the Universe

What if, Kathleen, you're already doing everything right, even though you're not sure?

And the surprises along the way have only sped things up, even though it felt like they slowed you down?

And all that you want is now barreling towards you, even though you can't see it?

And when it arrives it'll exceed your every expectation, even though your dreams were huge?

Wouldn't you be making some really weird noises about now? Whoohoo'ing, howling... maybe even whoohoo-howl-barking?

Well?

    The Universe

Faith, Prayer and History

"We need to make a national examination of conscience. Why do we need a national examination of conscience?? Because suddenly we Americans seem to be panicking. It's time to stop moaning and wringing our hands. It's true; the country is in a crisis. But we have always been in a crisis. We ought to thank God we are. Because then we always have something to test us -- like a piece of steel that stays strong precisely because it is enduring great pressure."

These extremely timely words were spoken on February 7, 1968 by Sargent Shriver in a speech he gave at Notre Dame University.  With the economic situation looking bleak, mayhem and riots running rampant in other parts of the world and our own country's Occupy movement growing larger week by week, it is easy to see the glass half empty.   I don't know what the answers are.  I do know we have overcome difficult challenges in the past and we will endure many more in the future.  I take comfort in Sargent Shrivers words and trust we will rise to this test --"like a piece of steel that stays strong precisely because it is enduring great pressure."

Faith and prayer.  It may sound innocent and naive but it's all I've got at the moment.  And history.  We've got that on our side too.

 

Thinking Out Loud

Those of you who know me know how much I like to journal with symbols, images and colors to express and release emotions and energies.  A few days back I was feeling quite "fragile" and this is the page that appeared in my journal that day.  As always, the emotion passed as emotions are known to do, especially if we invite them in instead of resisting them. 

Sometimes I wonder if these invisible energies are moving through time and space, silently waiting for the next unsuspecting soul to stumble into their web.  My moments of fragility have passed for now but all around me I find other friends and family caught up in the same states of mind and body.  It reminds me of the energy of the planets and stars and the study of Astrology.  Energies swirling around in the heavens, having their way with we humans, whether we believe them to be real or not.  Laughing at our arrogance and naivete as we squirm and struggle, trying to resist their grasp and regain control of our lives.........

Life as Play

I am always surprised by the spontaneous eruption of pure pleasure  that accompanies a little glue, paper and ink under my finger nails.  Me, a grown woman, tearing and cutting, glueing and stamping, feeling like a child in kindergarten.  Why don't I do it more often?

I had an astrology reading recently.  I don't remember which planet is in conjuction with which house in my chart but the energy that will surround me these last few weeks of summer and into the autumn months is "Playful and Fun".   I can definitely tend to take things a little too seriously.   Even my journal pages "need" to have a message.  How much fun did I have glueing down these odds and ends and adding a stamp or two?  Lots.  Is there a purpose?  Who cares!  It was fun.  Just plain fun.  No deeper intention necessary.

...man is made God's plaything, and that is the best part of him.

Therefore every man and woman should live life accordingly,

and play the noblest games....

What, then, is the right way of living?

Life must be lived as play.....

~Plato, Laws

 

Open

Open.  That was an interesting word to come up in my morning journal page.  Hmmm.....

Open mind

Wide open spaces

Open doors

Open hearted

Open arms

Open to the possibilites

Open and shut

Open ended questions

Open for business

Open relationships

Open your eyes

Broken open

 

Hmmm.....very interesting indeed.

 

 

 

Accepting Life

Accepting life as it is has been one of my spiritual practices for many years.  Some days I do good and other days, not so good.  Some times it is easy to let go of my resistance and other days, not so easy.   My journal page this morning helped to center me and re-align me with my intention as did these words;

To practice acceptance authentically,

we must also accept our frustration and disappointment.

We don't try to change what's happening,

nor do we try to change how we are

thinking and feeling about it.

We just let everything be as it is.

Paul Ferrini

"Enlightenment for Everyone"

 

Now if I can just keep this in mind, maybe I won't take my husband's grumpy mood personally.  And maybe not!

Memories and Mysteries

The end of the year Graduation and Prom celebrations officially begin today.  Our high school's Senior Celebration is this evening and Steve and I are among the many parents helping put it together.   Victoria is more than ready to leave high school and get on with her college adventure.  Stevie, on the other hand, is quite depressed about his college days coming to an end.   He has even asked me not to talk about it as much as possible.  He also suggested I may not want to wear any make-up next week for his Commencement.  "Momma, you know how much you cry and when you see me crying.....you are going to cry even more!" 

How wonderful it must be to love something so much.  As bittersweet as it is,  Stevie is an extremely fortunate young man to have been a part of a community that means the world to him.  His friends and memories will always be near his heart as he begins the next leg of his journey.

May God grant us the courage and grace to glide gently through the fond memories we each hold dear and the unknown mysteries that lie ahead.

Letting Go, Little by Little

I created this collage yesterday.  I was experimenting with ink and water so I threw caution to the wind and added one of my precious antique scraps of paper.  Those of you who do not have this hoarding disorder may not really appreciate how hard it it to let these little tid bits go.   But as I sit and contemplate this piece, I find so many of my lessons peeking through. 

Of course the big and most obvious is letting go.  With relationships, children, a way of life, or the simple quiet of the morning that is now and has been accompanied by hammers and saws for over a month, life is about living in the present and letting go of the resistance to have it look any way other than how it does this very minute.   (That's a very long sentence but I am letting go of my need to re-write it!) 

I think my letting go muscles are getting stronger.  I am getting more and more comfortable with the mystery of not knowing how things will work out.  Just letting them be as they are and staying present in the moment. 

Giving birth and nourishing,

Having without possessing,

acting with no expectations,

leading and not trying to control:

this is the supreme virtue.

                                                       Stephen Mitchell, Tao Te Ching